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[18 Jul 2008|10:14pm] |
We were fostering some kittens for the Humane Society, and I had to take them to the vet the other day for ear mites. The vet scraped a bunch of gunk out of their ears and asked me if I want to see it under the microscope. Fuck yes!
I don't know if she offers that to everyone of if I just look like the kind of person that would appreciate it ...
It was pretty awesome though. The mites were in all stages of development: eggs, larva, juveniles and adults. I got to watch them crawling around all creepy-like. It was a good day ^_^
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| SHITTER OVERLOOOOAD! |
[18 Jul 2008|11:57pm] |
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music |
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M83 "Couleurs" |
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Do you guys ever not shit for like days and then all of a sudden it's like OH HEY-O, IT'S YO' COLON SPEAKING. WAKE UP CAUSE I'M READY AGAIN!!!!
Okay, so I hadn't pooed in 3 days until yesterday. I ate like 3 of those Fiber One bars while I was at work during the day thinking it might help clear out because I was feeling bloated/heavy (I was also PMSing reeeeally badly, so it was like "Oh hello, yes, I AM an elephant today, thanks for noticing.") Most awful decision of my life. Or actually, maybe the best. You decide.
I thought I was going to shart in the car going home. Not only did I start my period (which is like the heaviest it's EVER been) the second I got home, but I took four consecutive shits. Not like one good shit and then three little leftover shits, nono. Four AWESOME, period-shits. You know the kind. Ohmygod. I didn't ever think it was going to stop. Then I woke up this morning and had two more.
I stayed home from work today because my asshole is a crazed little man. Luckily, the monsoon of shit has ended. YAY. So, verdict: Blocked colon + period + Fiber One bars = Pooey Pooey Good Time.
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[19 Jul 2008|03:36am] |
This is what happens to your
toilet when your body doesn't
digest fat..... oily discharge.
( Read more... )
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| TO THE LADIES!!! |
[18 Jul 2008|06:13pm] |
Have you ever been for a walk on a humid day and the combination of sweat and lady juices makes a bubble in your vagina, so you can feel it as you walk? Kinda like a fart bubble but you have to kinda...squick it out, because you just can't pop those with your kegal muscles. Or maybe I'm just crazy.
P.S. I just took a poo and I turned around and there was a string in it...like a thick tampon-esque string. And I KNOW it was a string, not a tape worm...I just dont know when I would've swallowed one...
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[18 Jul 2008|09:50am] |
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mood |
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 accomplished |
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The sweat under my boobs smells like putrefying bananas... which smell like white vineger. blech
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| Just One Question. |
[18 Jul 2008|10:33am] |
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I was at the Wal-Mart I work at, and I saw the Black Parade Is Dead, only it said 'edited.' Is there an unedited version for sale at other retailers, or just edited?
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[17 Jul 2008|09:15pm] |
Hey guys, I need a little help with something here...
I read this quote a long time ago, like the beginning of the year, and it's stuck to my head ever since. I think it was Mikey that said it, and it was basically about high school being the worst time of your life or something like that. So, I would really appreciate if someone could find it for me so I can live in peace without this half quote I remember haunting me, lol.
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| Untagged? |
[18 Jul 2008|05:55pm] |
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mood |
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 crappy |
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Does anyone have this pic of Brian untagged and perhaps bigger?
It's so damn good looking... <3
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| It's the End of the Internet as We Know It, and I Feel Fine |
[18 Jul 2008|05:37am] |
Cakefarts is exactly what it says. NSFW
OMFG
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[18 Jul 2008|07:26pm] |
Okay so this is a sequel to yesterday's post where I got told that my 'impacted feces' would require a community nurse to come to my house and give me an enema.
Let me tell you, the less enjoyable part of having a stranger stick her fingers up my butt to 'see where the poo is', followed by a fleet enema was TOTALLY made up for by the sheer relief of expelling three weeks worth of food.
Oh, and I blocked my parents' toilet. sorry mum.
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| Mild, but I've got nothing better to do ... |
[17 Jul 2008|11:07pm] |
I love New York Burrito, but their wraps are just too big to be eaten in one setting. So I saved mine for later. Later being about 4 hours later, part of which was spent in a car in the 90+ degree weather we had today.
It smelled fine so I ate it. Baaaaad idea.
I puked up what I could and I'm still having stomach cramps and general food poison / flu-esque symptoms. And to make matters worse, the garlic that was in my wrap is oozing out of my pores, and no matter how many times I brush my teeth my mouth tastes like it. Not that I don't like garlic, but it's not pleasant when you're dry heaving.
In other news, I like to dress my puppy up and figuring that baby clothes would be interchangeable with puppy clothes, bought him a baby tank top from the dollar store. It was apparently too long because he ended up peeing INSIDE the shirt, then came and jumped in my lap, covering us both with pee.
My life is full of bad decisions.
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| My pink bedroom *_* |
[17 Jul 2008|11:48am] |
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HI! This is my first post here and i fell nervous. My name is Lucy, i'm 22 and from Russia. So, this is my bedroom.
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| Question. |
[17 Jul 2008|09:49am] |
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I've never seen anyone do this- but I was wonering if it was a good idea to move my bed into my closet instead of it having it take up space in my room. I want to work on my room to give it more of a lounge-y feeling and make it more mature looking. I realize I'd have to get some kind of nice looking outer storage for my clothes that I would be replacing. My closet is big- it can fit a full size bed with the frame. Any suggestions or comments? Pictures of my room will come soon, I just need to replace the cord for my camera. (:
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| need advice! |
[17 Jul 2008|02:59pm] |
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music |
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magnetic fields |
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Alright, so I just moved back home and my room suddenly feels very young to me, so I'm sort of redoing it, and I've got a few problem spots.
( Pictures etc. )
Full post when I finish redecorating!
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[17 Jul 2008|06:48pm] |
my room project is a big mess. i've put aside the shadow box things, but thanks to the ones who game me ideas, i know what to do now :)
i'm trying to get the room clean and neat before my gf comes home from a long tour, but due to lack of money... i have to use what i got to organize... that includes a couple of small tin boxes and a few cardoboard boxes.
( questions and messy messy pics! )
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| :-D |
[18 Jul 2008|02:19am] |
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mood |
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 pleased |
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First thought:
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[17 Jul 2008|05:11pm] |
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mood |
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Sick and Relieved |
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music |
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Alanis Morissette- Uninvited/Mr. Duplicity |
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So earlier today I found out my fiance has had a girlfriend on the side for not one, but two months. Say what? yeah. the weird thing... he proposed to me two weeks ago. WHILE STILL DATING HER. That is not the point though, that is just the intro.
So sometime after the crying stopped, and I called him a disgusting pig, and he managed to call me an ungrateful bitch (and then tell me I should burn my dress... while still inside it)... my stomach began to gurgle.
No... these were not hungry pains.
Apparently the mixture of anger, sadness, shock and relief (yeah, relief... which should show that this relationship was fucked in the first place) Had caused my insides to go NUTSO.
Yeah, I have been squirting liquid poopy that burns like hell. Feel's like it's just adding insult to injury! What the hell life? Seriously.
The weird thing... all of my poops have been pale green. Almost.... mint green. It's actually quite a spectacular color. I'm considering painting my walls that color. That would be awesome... I should take a picture of it next time and go into Sherwin Williams and ask them if they can color match it. :D
Unfortunately, no pictures right now. They are pretty small poopies, but also way frequent. It is hell in a hand bag, ladies and gentlemen. Hell in a handbag.
I'm also considering some form of revenge on my ex (of course... It isn't in me to actually do anything... but I'd like to think I would actually do something). Any sneaky suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
Also... random end of post, not very tmi question: Who the hell do i think about while masturbating now? I've never been one for celebrity fantasy... Now I'm frustrated!
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| Since I was already telling my friend this story... |
[17 Jul 2008|02:51pm] |
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mood |
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 amused |
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I had a really, really bad kidney infection several years ago...went to the hospital, etc. Because I was on the rag, they had to catheterize me to get a urine sample...the nurse came in to stick the catheter in, and having had a catheter before, I was freaked out, because the other time SUCKED.
She put it in like it was NOTHING and I was so glad. I made mention of how I had to pee, and she told me go ahead, I have the catheter in. I told her nah, that I'd wait, too weird.
So, she's down below working her stuff, and I eventually realize I shouldn't wait to pee, it hurts. So, I just let it go.
ALL OVER HER. Piss everywhere.
She had already taken out the catheter.
To make matters worse, my mother was there, and I was all weirded out that she was able to see my private bits (okay when you're a child, NOT OKAY when you're a grown woman).
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